Relationships are beautiful when they begin, full of mystery and sex and slightly provocative texts 12 of your friends read over before you send them. The mystery soon fades, and gives way to more honest and open communication often in the form of disgusting texts about gas and chores. Below is a comprehensive chronicle of how you text in a relationship.
1. Pre-dating. When you’re crushing hard and want to give the impression you’re a strong, independent woman who never poops and is just the right amount of thirsty.
2. One month. Your thirst for each other is mutual and constant. You are still a poop-free unicorn goddess.
3. Two months. You’re chill enough to proofread your own texts, dammit. And too happy to care.