Trust is the cornerstone of absolutely every single successful relationship.
Having the assurance that your partner will not do anything behind your back or in a suspicious manner gives you the peace of mind to know you are in a 100% trustworthy relationship.
However, time to time, a person may start to show signs that they aren’t being honest with you.
Immediately, you become suspicious and start to carefully watch them – looking for any sign that they may be lying about something or even cheating on you!
You may even start to feel crazy, wondering if you are reading into things too much! Doubting your suspicions often comes as a result of deeply caring for someone and not wanting to see the bad in them.
However, there is something about a “gut feeling” that often ends up being correct.
Below are 9 signs that your partner isn’t exactly trustworthy:
1.) THEY ARE OVERLY PROTECTIVE OF THEIR PHONE
…this goes for phones, laptops, computers, tablets, etc.
If your partner doesn’t like you picking up their phone or even looking over their shoulder while they are on it…there is most certainly something very suspicious going on.
Several months ago, one of my friend’s fiance became increasingly protective of his cellphone. As their wedding day approached, she became increasingly uncomfortably with his insistence that she not go near his phone. One day, she grabbed his phone, ran into her room and locked the door. After searching through messages and looking through his apps, she found a secret chatroom app where he was talking to another girl’s in the area and meeting up with them behind her back.
Her suspicions were spot on! Heartbroken, but relieved, she broke off their relationship immediately.
Pro Tip: Often, an untrustworthy partner will insist that they are doing something to surprise you or they have private business information on their phone. Although this is occasionally true, it is usually a worthless tactic to convince you do not find the information that they are trying to hide from you.
2.) THEY FLIRT WITH PEOPLE IN FRONT OF YOU
Some people are so disrespectful to their partner that they will flirt with someone right in front of them…and then make an excuse for it.
“Don’t be so sensitive and jealous! Of course, I would never cheat on you!”
“I wasn’t flirting! You know me – I was just being kind!”
“It was completely harmless! I was just having some fun…and they started it.”
They will make excuse after excuse, making you feel like the person with the problem. Don’t fall for it!
You are worth so much more than to be with someone that thinks it is harmless to flirt with someone, while they are in a committed relationship.
Stop tolerating this type of behavior. You are way too good for them!
If they are willing to flirt with someone in front of you, imagine what they are willing to do behind your back. Typically, this is a sign that they are probably going to eventually cheat on you.
3.) YOU GET REALLY JEALOUS – VERY EASILY!
First, let me point out that there is a chance that the problem may be with you. If you are a naturally jealous person, you may have to work on controlling your jealousy and not allowing it to become a toxic part of your life.
However, many times, your partner’s behavior can turn you into an insecure, jealous individual.
Perhaps your partner is secretive, flirtatious, unreliable, or even acting fake. As you start to distrust them, you start reading into everything they do!
If you see them talking to an old friend or having a conversation with someone of the opposite sex, you immediately feel jealous and overly sensitive. You immediately feel like they are up to no good – and you even start to hate the person they are talking to (even though they probably have nothing to do with it).
This is a sure sign that your relationship has a severe lack of trust.
Although jealousy can be a natural part of every relationship, it can become an unhealthy obsession that is very destructive to your relationship.
4.) THEY GET REALLY DEFENSIVE WHEN YOU ASK THEM QUESTIONS
If you feel insecure about a part of your relationship, the first thing you should do is talk about it! Communication is one of the most important parts to your relationship!
However, if your partner gets upset or super defensive about your concerns, there is a pretty good chance they are trying to hide something.
When asking sensitive questions, be careful! You don’t want to come across as angry or accusatory in the beginning. If you are in a committed relationship, you should ask the question in a respectful and sincere manner.
If you point fingers at them right away, of course, they are going to get defensive.
But if they get really mad in the very beginning of a normal conversation, this is a sign that they are probably guilty about something and trying to cover it up with excessive, victimizing emotions.
5.) YOU START FINDING OUT THINGS ABOUT THEM THAT THEY NEVER TOLD YOU
Every committed relationship should be grounded on trust – meaning you should have already discussed any critical information about your past or disclosed personal details that may effect the future of the relationship.
You should never hide anything from your life’s partner!
If you suddenly find out about a string of ex’s, a major life event, or any other piece of unexpected information – chances are there is a reason they are trying to hide it from you.
Especially if this information may have swayed your decision in starting a relationship with them, you should feel very distrustful of what they may or may not have told you about themselves.
If they have chosen not to tell you crucial facts about themselves, there is a significant chance that they are not trustworthy in other areas of your relationship as well.
6.) YOUR FRIENDS/FAMILY ARE GETTING SUSPICIOUS
Many times, family and friends will notice your toxic partner before you do!
I understand that sometimes family or friends may be jealous or manipulative. You will have to be the judge of their character! Typically, they are the people who truly care about you and want you to be with someone who deserves you.
From their perspective, they may see your partner as someone who is not trustworthy. You may be deeply in love and totally ignoring key signs that this person is dishonest and sneaky!
Allow your friends and family to give you critical advice on your relationship. It may be difficult to hear in the beginning, but it may be the only way to save you from allowing someone to sabotage your life!
7.) YOU FEEL LIKE YOU HAVE TO CONFIRM THEIR WHEREABOUTS
Person 1: “Where were you last night?”
Person 2: “I told you! I was out having dinner with my friends after work.”
Person 1: “Well, I asked your friends if they saw you last night and they said they didn’t! Where were you really?”
This scenario plays out in a relationship after relationship! One person tells a lie and their partner catches them in it!
After that, they never fully trust them again. They feel the need to confirm where they are at – only to catch them in one lie after another.
If you feel like you always need to confirm where they are or confirm what they say, you are probably in a relationship that you need to end soon.
8.) THEY CHEATED IN A PREVIOUSLY RELATIONSHIP
I know! You believe in second chances. You want to believe that your partner would never hurt you in that way!
However, have you heard the saying, “Once a cheater, always a cheater”?
Statistics match this saying! Did you know that people who have cheated before are 350% more likely to cheat again?
I understand that there are always miraculous exceptions! The ones that cheat on their spouse and never cheat again. However, the chances of that are incredibly slim.
If you are in a relationship with a former cheater, you better be watching your back!
9.) SOMETHING JUST DOESN’T FEEL RIGHT
At the beginning of this article, I mentioned your “gut feeling”.
Sometimes, a “feeling” is all you need to start feeling like you can’t trust your partner.
Maybe their story doesn’t quite line up, they are acting slightly different, or you simply notice a difference in the atmosphere of the relationship.
Your senses start picking up on things you’ve never noticed before. You start to feel suspicious and even nauseous, thinking that the person you thought you knew may be making some incredibly hurtful decisions.
Every day, you see more signs that they can’t be trusted! Eventually, you are going to have to confront them – with some proof that your “gut feelings” were 100% correct.
Realizing that your partner is a liar, cheater, or a total fake is something no one wants to go through.
However, the #1 step is to realize that there is a possibility that you can’t trust them. Next, you must start looking for the signs – like the ones listed above.